So where have we been? For those of us who are new to our, ahem, zany antics, Kosher Eucharist was a short-lived webcomic starring a somewhat reticent Jew and a somewhat hormonally-charged, volatile Catholic, characters that were IN NO WAY based upon myself and Chris, that transmogrified into a blog in which we commented on politics, history, Israel, Judaism, Catholicism, our university (Tulane) and our shared love, Fran Drescher. The last time our loyal readers heard from us, circa midsummer 2005, I was on a summer vacation in Israel and Chris was…I think he was living with his dad in Texas or something, I forget. Now, more than a year later, and in the wake of a major hurricane which wrecked our home city and scattered us to the winds, I’ve permanently moved to Israel and am less than a month away from my supposed induction date into the IDF (which is, objectively, not the best time to be taken by inspiration and restart one’s old blog), and Chris is a month away from graduating from college, after which he will visit Israel for three weeks before moving somewhat indefinitely to New Zealand. Why New Zealand? I’m not entirely sure, but he can explain for himself.

Fortunately for you, we’re bursting with ideas for how to restore Kosher Eucharist to its former glory and beyond. Including, inshallah:

- A regular feature, admittedly somewhat inspired by Nick Hornby’s “Songbook,” in which I will post an MP3 of one of my favorite songs and discuss music, history and my feelings as they relate to the song. That’s right. I’m going to be talking about my feelings. I thought I’d try something new.
- Erratic posts, once I’m drafted, about the fun times I’m sure to have in my capacity as a weapon of war in the arsenal of the Israeli military.
- Chris’ thrilling travelogues from Israel and New Zealand and points inbetween. I’m looking forward to the report on wacky New Zealand pizza chain Hell Pizza.
- What I hope will become a weekly feature with Official Kosher Eucharist Mascot Flannery (the world’s Jewiest Catholic girl), Fridays with Flan, in which Flannery will demonstrate for us relevant and timely words in American Sign Language, such “Jew” and “vagina.”
- Chris’ perennial dissatisfaction with the state of affairs in the Holy See.
- And, as always, our shrill rantings about how fat and unlovely we find Suha Arafat, the Grand Dame of Gay Paris.

I’m so excited I could get off the couch.